About Siri's Marriage
Peace, mercy and blessings of God
Ustadz, I want to ask a question.
First, Is it permissible to marry in front of a kiai or cleric? Then, a few years or a few months later it was legally inaugurated by state law. Or, is there a time limit?
Second, is it called siri marriage?
Third, I have many times wished for a formal wedding. I'm here (Hong Kong) and my husband is in Indonesia, but I want a clear status. However, my husband did not do that, even though all my expenses took care of it. Now our sirri marriage has been going on for 11 years. What do I have to do?
I have threatened many times with the sentence, "We are no longer husband and wife if the official marriage has not been taken care of for so many years." Is it if I leave it that I sin? Or am I wrong?
Seek advice from Ustadz. I'm at a loss for words. He lives in my house, he takes care of my child from childhood. But I also want a clear status.
Please enlighten.
Thank you, Ustadz.
Greetings, Fulanah
ANSWER:
Peace be upon you and God's mercy and blessings be upon you
Thanks for the question.
Basically, marriage in Islam is declared valid if it fulfills the pillars of marriage. Namely, there are two potential partners, there are two witnesses, a guardian from the woman's side, and a consent agreement. All of these are mandatory requirements to be met. Marriage in front of religious figures (kiai, ustadz, ulama) is often stated with the term siri, a popular term for marriages that are religiously legal, but not recorded in state documents.
Meanwhile in Indonesia, the law governing marriage has been contained in Law Number 1 of 1974 concerning Marriage. The validity of a marriage according to the Marriage Law is stated in Article 2 paragraph (1) which reads "Marriage is legal, if it is carried out according to the laws of each religion and belief."
Furthermore, Article 2 paragraph (2) states that every marriage is recorded according to the applicable legislation.
If a siri marriage has been carried out or married in front of a kiai/ulama, in order to register the marriage legally registered in state law, the thing that can be done is to file a Marriage Itsbat to the Religious Court. So, there is no need for a re-approval.
It should be done as soon as possible, because marriage registration (marriage book, marriage certificate) is very important in our country. Among other things, to take care of documents, confirm the child's status, and so that no party is harmed in the event of a divorce.
Marriage is a noble worship. Of course the goal is not just a biological need alone. Therefore, in our country, we have accommodated the 1974 Marriage Law so that marriage brings benefits.
Many practical benefits can be taken from there. Here are some of them:
- Provide legality of marriage according to religion and state law;
- Facilitate bureaucracy;
- Ensuring the wife can get her rights;
- Ensure the welfare of children;
- Facilitate the management of child custody;
Therefore, it is better to take care of itsbat or determination at the nearest KUA or Religious Court as soon as possible.
Wallâhu a'lam bish-showâb.
Regards!
[Answered by: Ustadz H. Ahmad Fauzi Qosim]
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