Law and Adab Are Friends

DDHK.ORG - Oleh Ustadzah Nur Hamidah, Lc., M.Ag.

Presented at the Expatriate Weekend Halaqoh, Tuesday, December 29, 2020

The term friendship in the Qur'an is mentioned in several words. Namely, khalil, qorin, chum, shodiq, rofiq, bithonah, and wali.

The Qur'an teaches two bases for making lasting friends. First, ukhuwah or brotherhood because of the bonds of faith, not based on lineage, profession, or principles of benefit and comfort. Al-Qur'an emphasizes that by preaching we will learn to be patient and tolerant with each other.

Second, the basis of piety. Takwa itself is a preventive attitude or prevention from going to hell.

There are four ethics and guidelines for making friends with Muslim fellow. That is:

1. Reconcile disputes and avoid suudzhon.
2. Maintain self-respect and family, restrictions on genitals and sexual harassment, prohibition of physical and social abuse, prohibition of prejudice, and prohibition of stalking for gossip.
3. Keep the honor of blood. For this, the qisos law and fines for murderers apply even though they are still fetuses.
4. Maintaining the honor of property, prohibiting eating friends' property with zhalim, and applying the concept of accounts payable.

Your child's friend is Heaven or Hell

The wrong choice of friends can be a problem that can damage the resilience of teenagers Indonesia. This problem presents negative things and even criminality among them.

Among them, free sex life and abortion, drinking, rape and immoral acts, drug abuse, and smoking at an early age. Other negatives, such as uncivilized behavior, driving on social media narcissistic platforms without control, addiction to pornography, and add to the almost endless use of gadgets.

Live in this world only once. We shouldn't waste it. In order to avoid negative things to adolescents like the one above, it is very important for family resilience and child assistance.

Make friends with non-Muslims

The Koran has provided guidelines as well as limits for Muslims in making friends with non-Muslims. Based on Surah Al-Mumtison verses 1 and 8-9, these limitations are mentioned. Namely:

1. O you who believe, do not take My enemies and your enemies into the loyal friends that you convey to them (Muhammad's messages), out of compassion; When in fact they have denied the truth that comes to you, they cast out the Messenger and (expel) you because you believe in Allah, your Lord. if you really go out to strive in My way and seek My pleasure (do not do that). You told them secretly (Muhammad's messages), out of compassion. I know better what you hide and what you express. And whoever among you who does it, then behold, he has strayed from the straight path.
2. Allah does not forbid you to do good and be fair to people who did not fight you because of religion and did not (also) expel you from your country. Indeed, Allah loves those who are fair.
3. Indeed, Allah only forbids you to make as your friends those who fight against you because of religion and expel you from your country, and help (other people) to expel you. And whoever makes them friends, then they are the wrongdoers.

Regarding friendship with non-Muslims, it must be based on the nature of Ar-Rohman and Ar-Rohim Allah. Ar-Rohman, the Most Giver and not hunks of the necessities of life of all His creatures. Meanwhile, Ar-Rohim, Most Merciful with pleasure, forgiveness, and a special gift for believers.

So the nature of Ar-Rohman with non-Muslims is permitted, in terms of:

1. Spread kindness without exception.
2. Please Help in terms of the benefit of nature and humans.
3. Give each other gifts and care about humanity.
4. Prabaligh orphans regardless of religious status.

Meanwhile, the prohibition on Ar-Rohim for non-Muslims includes:

1. The prohibition helps to deliver their strength in leadership which results in difficulties for Muslims to worship in totality.
2. Prohibition of ritual tolerance.
3. The prohibition makes it a place to confide in a Muslim izzah. [DDHK News]