DDHK. ORG – Provide maintenance to family It is the duty of the father as the head of the family. But what if a father doesn't even provide a penny? Listen consultation online together chaplain the following.
Assalamualaikum Ustadz.
Sorry before I want to ask, related obligation to provide a living a father to his family.
If he has an adult daughter who is not married, and currently the child's status is the backbone of the family. All costs are borne by the daughter from the age of 19 until now she is 26 years old.
And the father did not give any more maintenance to his family. He is no longer the backbone of the family, even though his father is still relatively healthy and strong enough to make a living when he only rides motorbike taxis.
The mother feels guilty for her daughter. Because according to him, the child is still the obligation of the parents until the child is married and the child should not be the backbone of the family.
So, from my story, is there any law Ustadz? And what should be done?
Salam
Fulanah
Jawab
Peace be upon you and God's mercy and blessings be upon you
WL…
It is the duty of the head of the household, namely the father, to provide maintenance to his wife and children. A man or father becomes a leader as well as the life support for his family, so that Allah Subhanãhu wa Ta'ala glorifies him.
{ ٱلرِّجَالُ قَوَّ ٰمُونَ عَلَى ٱلنِّسَاۤءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ ٱللَّهُ بَعۡضَهُمۡ عَلَىٰ بَعۡض ࣲ وَبِمَاۤ أَنفَقُوا۟ مِنۡ أَمۡوَ ٰلِهِمۡۚ {سُورَةُ النِّسَاءِ: ٣٤}
"Men are leaders for women, because Allah has exalted some of them (men) over some others (women), and because they (men) have spent some of their wealth." {QS An-Nisa': 34}
Allah Subhanãhu wa Ta'ala also says:
Amen
"And it is the duty of the father to provide for their maintenance and clothing in a proper manner." {QS Al-Baqarah: 233}
Likewise with children, it is the duty of a father to provide for him. It was narrated by Abu Hurairah radliyallãhu'anhu, that there was a man who said: 'O Messenger of Allah, I actually have one dinar.' Rasulullah said: "Infakan for yourself." The man said: 'I have another.' Rasulullah said: "Infak it on your child." The man said: 'I have another.' The Prophet said: "Infak it on your wife." The man said: 'I have another.' The Prophet said: "Infak it on your servant." The man said again: 'I have another.' Rasulullah said: "You know better with him." (HR Baihaki)
According to the Syafi'i school of thought, the obligation of a father to provide for his child is if the child is still small, not yet mature, has no assets, is in the pursuit of knowledge, is crazy, or is sick.
However, if the child is independent & has income, or is married, then the parents are not obliged to provide for their child.
Providing maintenance to parents for children is an obligation, especially for sons even if they are married, provided they are able. As for a daughter, if she is married, she is not obliged to provide for her parents unless her parents are poor and she has to ask permission from her husband.
Mentioned in the book Al-Majmu' Syarah Al-Muhaddzab:
“Relatives who are entitled to receive maintenance are both parents and above (grandparents, etc.), children and so on. And it is obligatory for children to provide for father & mother, the argument is the word of Allah Subhanãhu wa Ta'ala:
وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلا تَعْبُدُوا إِلا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا {سورة الإسراء: ٢٣}
"And your Lord has commanded you not to worship other than Him and you should do good to your parents in the best way possible." {QS Al-Isra': 23}
Among doing good to both of them is giving a living.
But giving a living must be in a way that is acceptable or proper or proper. Both the maintenance of parents to children or children to parents. Providing a living must be proportionate according to needs & should not be excessive, especially if the parents who are supposed to be working hard still rely on their children to provide for them, especially if the child is an unmarried woman. The point is that we must both carry out our respective duties so as not to abuse our rights. Islam is a middle religion, so in matters of living, one must put it in the right position.
Children have the opportunity to do good to both parents by giving it to them, but parents also should not rely on their children's living if they are still able to work so that household life runs dynamically and harmoniously.
May Allah ease all our affairs, amen...
Peace, mercy and blessings of God
Answered by Ustadz Very Setiawan.
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